Day Pass

Wednesday March 4th, 2009.

Hi Everyone, its been a few days. The Hajjar-Randell family have had a few rough days and even worse nights. I feel like i sound like a broken record but we still have a very sick boy and no answers as to why he is still vomitting and having these severe tummy pains and frankly its really starting to scare both Jason and I because we just don't know how much more of this Jacob can take. 

Today however was a good day. we just don't get excited about them anymore but we really needed this day because we both were going to lose our minds. Yesterday we went home. all three of us. yes that's right, we got a pass after 4 months. Jacob was not well and very ill actually, threw up at home no different then from his hospital bed. After two hours he actually wanted to go back to the hospital, which was ok with us. It wasn't what we had hoped but honestly, it felt great to see him at home. To see him sitting on the couch under the blanket felt so sereal but felt wonderful. It was a reminder that he still lives there and he will be back home someday. He didn't say a word, not ONE word the entire time we were home or in the car there and back but its ok. We just let him absorb everything and remind him that he still has a bedroom to go back to. 

Jacob continues his radiation treatments without sedation. That's right, he has completed 6 treatments now. He's become a pro and is quite the champ and again i wish he could comprehend how huge this accomplishment is. We are proud of him more and more each day that he completes a treatment.

Tonight, once again I can only hope that my baby will find peace and get a good night sleep.

sleep well peanut. mommy loves you.